Dream Night

  It was an outing with her friends. It was a break from their hectic lives. It was supposed to be fun and exciting but somehow, it didn’t just cut it. Maybe it was because she felt lonely or she just didn’t want to mix around. She wasn’t always like that. No, she used to talk a lot, joke and smile often but under several circumstances, it has been hard. For one thing, she had just buried her precious dog of twelve years. The other was because she just had a disagreement with her best friend.

  Throughout the whole time, she was broody and quiet. All her friends took notice immediately at her obvious withdrawal to the group. It might be because someone she rather not be seeing was there alongside the rest. Or maybe because she just couldn’t stop thinking of the recent happenings in her life. Why must this happen to me? I rarely have things go my way... For once, can’t anyone just give me a break? She knew that it was awful to feel like that when there were millions of others suffering a worse fate. But at that moment, she just couldn’t help but feel sorry for herself.

  The night was late and all her friends were asleep soundly in their warm comfortable beds. They had taken up two hotel rooms as there were ten of them. You could even hear the gentle breathing of her roommates. The night was still and nothing stirred.

  While the rest slumbered, she was stood out on the balcony and reminisced about her past, being depressed and disappointed with how her life was turning out to be. But she wasn’t alone. As tears fell from her eyes, she heard her name being called softly from the other room. There he was. Her best friend was standing in the opposite balcony probably preoccupied with his own life and all the stress that has been going on. Hastily, she wiped her tears and smiled at him. Her smile reflected the pain she was feeling, pain that was present for months. Immediately, he sensed that something was wrong and beckoned her to his room.

  She tip-toed quietly as the occupants in his room were sound asleep and she didn't want to disturb them. As she walked past, one of them stirred and she stood still, waiting for him to fall back asleep. She slid quietly and joined her friend on the balcony. There, she drew a long breath and gazed at the glimmering stars above.

  “What’s on your mind?” he muttered silently, breaking her trance. He wasn’t staring at the beautiful scenery but looking directly at her, awaiting a reply. His gaze met hers and she turned red. “It’s really nothing much.”He raised his eyebrows at her. “Really...” She muttered. As she said that, she wanted to hit herself. She was on a holiday with her closest friends and there she was, feeling sorry for herself again. She was starting to wonder when she would ever return to normal. The both of them just stared quietly at the glimmering stars and appreciate the sounds of nature. Finally, he said, “You know, there’s more to life than him. He was only a chapter in your life. It is time you started writing new beginnings. It always gets better.”

  She sighed and pondered his advice. He was right, but somehow, she couldn’t let go. Her friends, as a joke, rubbed it in her face and the sting from the wound he caused burned her every time she saw him. She had a feeling that it would be there for a long time. He meant a lot to her. When she needed someone, he was conveniently there. She gave her fragile heart to what she knew now was an asshole and he broke it in two. After that, she had trouble trusting anyone with her thoughts and feelings, in fear of the consequences.

  The wind brushed against her, causing her to shiver from the cold. She was brought back to reality as he reached out to hold her, to give her warmth, to protect her. He knew how she felt and wanted to help her. To heal her. Once again, silence struck them. It was not often where the both of them were equally lost for words. The only other time that happened was when she was sad. But he still managed to cheer her up.

  “What will happen if I get hurt again?” she whispered. He continued the silence for a while. “Well, you just have to pick yourself up again. This is life. Bad things happen to the best of us.” As he said that, tears cascaded down her cheeks as she silently wept. Panic was aroused inside of him and on impulse, gave her a bear hug. She continued weeping into him as he stroked her hair, calming her down.

  “I promise never to hurt you...”

  That comment caught her off guard. She looked up to him and he gently wiped her tears away. He was shocked that those words came out of his mouth. He had vowed to keep quiet about his feelings toward her. He didn’t want to complicate her life anymore than it already was. It would make things difficult for him too. There would be questions from their circle of friends, maybe even disgust. But he couldn’t help it. He took her cold hands and brought her closer to him. Her eyes widened and before she could speak up, he gave her a kiss. It didn’t mean much. It was only a peck on the cheek. Friends, right? Why did all her emotions tumble out after that?

   She had feelings for him. She couldn’t deny that. Under different state of affairs, she would have been overcome with joy. This was a fantasy that she had hoped for since he started spending time with her. But at that moment, with the whirl of emotion she was feeling, she couldn’t take the risk.

  “I can’t do this. I don’t want to lose you as a friend. What if this doesn’t work out?” Her eyes widened with fright and she shook her head. Although in her mind, she had always wanted this to happen. But she never realised that it would come true. It might be an anecdote that had the same outcome. She always dreamt about it, praying to God. Now, it’s here. What did she have to lose? If it doesn’t work out, their friendship would be scarred. Was she willing to take that chance?

  “Now that this is out in the open, I really need to tell you. I never thought of you as a failure nor a disappointment. On the contrary, I think that you are an amazing girl filled with talent and have a heart of gold. Don’t ever think of yourself that way again. I’ve always liked you and I think you are a joy to be with.” He took a deep breath and looked away. All she could do was reply him with a long hug.

   “Thanks.” She murmured, touching his cheek. “I like you too. But what if we have..?” She couldn’t even say it. He shook his head.

  “I will never treat you the way he did. I know you are feeling the doubt. How can I assure you that you can trust me?”

  Leaning on the railing, she fell silent as the soft breeze caressed her cheek. He was right. She needed to get over the jerk and just take a chance. They wouldn’t know what the future was in store for them, but if they don’t go for it, would they regret it for the rest of their lives?

  Deep down, she knows that their friendship is strong enough to take a risk. It was the fact that they might jeopardize it beyond repair. Tonight, they both found out their true feelings toward one another. After that night, they couldn’t look each other the same way anymore. They had left their cards on the table, waiting to see if their gamble was worth it. Why not? They have been playing a game of cat and mouse for two months already.

  They smiled truly out of happiness as they embraced in the moonlight. This was a start to a new beginning and she loved every minute of it. May trouble come; they would face it head on and think things through rationally. Yes, there will be fights. Yes, there will be tension. But they’re doing it for love. That night started with two lonely people from different balconies, thinking about how miserable they are. But it ended with them finally realising the meaning of their friendship. Of what they meant to one another.